So it seems to me that when it comes to insulting people and describing people unfavourably, no one does it better than a classic lit book.
Cleverly veiled barbs and hooks are weaved in the prose, designed to sting and take the wind out of any character's sails.
So I thought it might be interesting to translate these insults into modern language just for the fun of it... after all it an insult in any era is enjoyable :p
She was a woman of high fashion -
What they meant to say : she's a vain, materialistic cow
She had a great deal of manners which classed her as the most affected of women-
What they meant to say: She's a boring snob
He was what she would describe as provincial-
What they meant to say: He isn't worth a second glance and is beneath me
She was a woman with a high, free spirit and was very engaging. She was often indelicate in her behaviour with men-
What they meant to say: She's a dirty tramp/slut/whore
He had a pleasant countenance and unaffected manner-
What they meant to say: He's alright
She is tolerable but not handsome enough to tempt me-
What they meant to say: She's a feral and no one in their right mind would be interested
She had very cordial feelings toward him-
What they meant to say: She was fantasining about marriage and the names of their babies
His sisters had the air of decided fashion -
What they meant to say: They were snobs who thought they looked better then they actually did
She was a woman of mean understanding, little information and an uncertain temper-
What they meant to say: She was not the sharpest tool in the shed
She had charming, happy manners -
What they meant to say: She didn't throw herself at men like the rest of her trampy friends
She was headstrong and spirited -
What they meant to say: She never did what she was told and enjoyed a good roll in the hay
He had a most ungentlemanly disposition -
What they meant to say: He was a chauvinist pig
She boasted neither cleverness nor beauty -
What they meant to say: She is a butt ugly idiot
She was fond of society -
What they meant to say: She liked to hob nob and lived to kiss ass
He was fond of his own society -
What they meant to say: He was a loner and was most likely into midget porn with the potential to be a serial killer
She had a wilful nature -
What they meant to say: She never did what daddy told her to do
and the best til last...
He was too proud for even his own company -
What they meant to say: He had his head up his ass so far he coudn't see straight
xx
J
No comments:
Post a Comment